Don't Be An A**hole

…is a great general rule of thumb, but today I’m talking about why you shouldn't be an asshole, to yourself.

It’s easy to get caught up in the seemingly endless cycle of stress, work, sleep and more stress. But neglect yourself for long enough and your body will start to protest. First quietly, maybe with fatigue, headache or acute injury. And because we’re so good at ignoring these warning signs (or medicating them, serving to only mask the symptoms), our bodies are forced to scream for our attention.

Perhaps with chronic disease, debilitating injury, metabolic distress, GI upset, depression, anxiety, malaise and/or overwhelming exhaustion. And still, with our body screaming and pleading for our attention every way it knows how, we ignore it.

I think we all have our reasons. Perhaps,

  • We feel guilty for saying no

  • We were taught to always put others first

  • We feel ruled by obligation and expectation

  • We don’t know how to take care of ourselves

    The list goes on…


I know I can certainly relate to these and I imagine, even if only in some small way, you can too. But here’s the thing - if we want our bodies to serve us and to treat us well for a lifetime, we have to be kind to them, nourish them, give them rest, movement and self-compassion.

We need to stop being an assholes to ourselves.

Think about treating a friend the way you treat yourself.


If a friend was in need of nourishment and asked you for a meal, would you neglect her? Tell her that she doesn’t need the extra calories and feed her a latte or a diet Coke instead?

I hope not.

If a friend was exhausted, worn out and overextended, would you suggest she “suck it up”, get through her to-do list, and just keep pushing through?

I hope not.

If a friend was sick, hurt or injured would you encourage her to ignore that feedback and push through the pain because she doesn’t have time to fall short of expectation or gain a few pounds?

I hope not.

If a friend asked you to get together to listen, just listen, would you talk over her - not stopping to ask how she’s doing - and criticize every imperfection and short coming you find fault with?

I surely hope not.


And yet, despite what or how much I hope, you do this. Every single day. To your closest friend. The friend who will stick with you for a lifetime (which you often take for granted). Instead of caring, nourishing and listening, you treat her like garbage.

But what if you didn’t? What if you traded your guilt, shame and unrealistic expectations for care, nourishment and appreciation? What then?

If you’re ready to find out, I’m ready to help you.

Later this month I’ll be launching my Befriend Your Body Mini-Course - 5 days of FREE content, inspiration and action steps to move toward body acceptance.

Will I see you there?

“and I said to my body, softly, ‘I want to be your friend.’ it took a long breath and replied, ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this.’” - Nayyirah Waheed

Eat Well. Live Well. Be Well.